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How to be a Tourist in Norway

by Lisa
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When I travel back home to the beautiful fjords of Norway, it seems that so has the rest of the world. Growing up in one of the most visited areas of Norway has gotten me used to tourists trampling around my driveway on a regular basis.

And I’ve picked up a few ways to point out the tourists from miles away.

I figured I would give you a firsthand guide to exactly how to be a tourist in Norway. If you are heading to Norway at any point in the near future, I’m sure it will be helpful. That way you don’t have to worry about whether people understand that you are a tourist. You’re welcome.

Disclaimer

I feel like a disclaimer is quite natural here; please take this post with a good dose of humor.

Everything listed below relates to tourist stereotypes I have personally encountered. And each point on the list can usually be used to tell the visitors from the locals. When several of these are present, you are guaranteed to have met a tourist.

However, this does not mean that I or my fellow Norwegians hate tourists, or have anything against them. Growing up by the fjords, I know and understand the value visitors from all over the world bring to our villages and communities.

Visiting Norway?

Whilst this is a fun post intended to be tongue-in-chic, I also have lots of *actual* Norway guides on this site to help you. Browse all my Norway guides here!

Planning a trip to Norway? Here is my step-by-step guide to planning your perfect trip!

Two girls taking a selfie in front of a beautiful Norwegian scenery

How to be a tourist in Norway: A quick guide

I was inspired by this article by my friend Tara when I wrote this. I thought it was hilarious, and wanted to do the same for Norway. Here’s exactly how you can be a tourist in Norway.

  • Arrive on a cruise ship whenever possible. If it’s your first cruise, head this way for my top tips and make sure to check out my Norwegian fjord cruise packing list!
  • After arriving on a cruise ship, contemplate how the cruise ship made it onto the fjord in the first place (I mean, they are lakes, aren’t they?).
  • If the above is not possible and you have rented a car on your trip; completely disregard common sense when it comes to traffic, and park anywhere. Use emergency blinkers to indicate that you have stopped to take a photo. Who needs them for emergencies anyway?
  • Have no regard for private property – Norway is your oyster!
  • Complain about how expensive it is to any customer service assistant you are dealing with. I’m sure it’s the server who personally set the prices here.
  • Don’t do your research when it comes to national holidays and celebrations, especially Norwegian Christmas traditions. This way you can show up unannounced on Christmas Eve and complain that everywhere is closed because people are too busy celebrating Christmas. Side note: here’s my guide to visiting Norway for Christmas.
  • Be mesmerised by the majestic nature, but ask us where the fjord is anyway. You may have missed it.
  • Don’t believe us when we say that all the country’s beauty is natural. Ask us when we turn off the waterfalls and if we drain the fjords in the Winter. Hint: We do not.
  • Actually, just ask any of these questions asked by tourists in Norway.
  • Insist on driving through our hairpin turns, in spite of locals advising you to take the outer route. Those roads aren’t meant for the untrained eye.
  • Carry one of these.
  • Don’t bother with research, knowing why the fjords are so popular and what they are isn’t necessary to make your trip perfect.
  • If you are Norwegian-American, talk loudly about your heritage and insist that you are a Viking – despite not even knowing where in Norway your heritage is from.
  • In fact, why don’t you just wear a helmet with horns picked up from one of the tourist shops in Oslo. I mean, all the famous Vikings wore them, right?
  • Buy only cheap, plastic souvenirs. Stay far away from authentic souvenirs from Norway.
  • If English is your first language: act incredibly surprised when every single Norwegian person you meet speak it fluently.
  • If English isn’t your first language: ask us if we speak Spanish.

Now you should be all set to come and visit my beautiful country, without having to worry about standing out from the crowd. Welcome!

Welcome to Norway!

In all seriousness; I do love it when people come to visit Norway. There’s a reason I share so many guides to Norway here on my blog.

I hope you have an amazing time during your visit, and that you’ll know better than to follow this list. In fact, you should see in as a list of things to avoid doing when you visit Norway.

If you are planning a trip to Norway in the next few months, but you are a little unsure of where to start when it comes to the planning, don’t miss my itineraries. They are easy to follow, and ready for immediate download. They range from a 1-2 to several days. You can start them in several of Norway’s major cities. They all focus on how you can best see the fjords during your visit!

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6 comments

Rachel G 6 June 2016 - 13:03

haha! We live (as expats, but I’ve had a home here since I was 13, so it feels like forever) in a tourist destination, too. Sometimes tourists are just plain embarrassing. With my pale skin I can be mistaken for a tourist by locals but that problem is easily solved when I break into Mandarin or Bahasa…

Reply
Pauline 6 June 2016 - 23:37

Hahahah Hilarious!! please walk in high heels when hiking the mountains! 🙂

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Karin Rambo 7 June 2016 - 04:58

So awesome! I cringe just thinking about these things haha!

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Becky @Disney in your Day 7 June 2016 - 19:45

Haha! I would love to visit but hopefully not act too much like this 😉

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Katie 8 June 2016 - 18:17

I’m so desperately wanting to visit Norway. It looks so beautiful. Hopefully not as you describe 😉

Katie // Words By Katie

Reply
Arzo Travels 8 June 2016 - 21:18

Haha. Love this post. Really, really want to visit and I will do all the things mentioned above 🙂

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