Now that I’ve graduated and am back by the beautiful fjords of Norway, it seems that so is the rest of the world. Having grown up in one of the most visited areas of Norway sure has gotten me used to having tourists trampling around in my driveway on a regular basis. If you are headed to Norway in the near future I figured I would give you a first hand guide on how to be a tourist in Norway. That way you don’t have to worry about whether people understand you are not local or not. You’re welcome.
Inspired by this post.
How to be a tourist in Norway
Arrive on a cruise ship whenever possible.
If the above is not possible and you are arriving on a bus; be very Asian.
Have no regard for private property – Norway is your oyster!
Complain about how expensive it is to any customer service worker you are dealing with. I’m sure it’s the ticket officer herself who set the prices here.
Be mesmerised by the majestic nature, but ask us where the fjord is anyway. You may have missed it.
Don’t believe us when we say that all the country’s beauty is natural. Ask us when we turn off the waterfalls and if we drain the fjords in the Winter. Hint: We do not.
Insist on driving through our hairpin turns, in spite of locals advising you to take the outer route. Those roads aren’t meant for the untrained eye.
Carry one of these.
Don’t bother with research, knowing why the fjords are so popular and what they are isn’t necessary.
If English is your first language: act incredibly surprised when every single Norwegian person you meet speak it fluently.
If English isn’t your first language: ask us if we speak Spanish.
Now you should be all set to come and visit my beautiful country. Welcome!
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