How to be a tourist in Norway

Now that I’ve graduated and am back by the beautiful fjords of Norway, it seems that so is the rest of the world. Having grown up in one of the most visited areas of Norway sure has gotten me used to having tourists trampling around in my driveway on a regular basis. If you are headed to Norway in the near future I figured I would give you a first hand guide on how to be a tourist in Norway. That way you don’t have to worry about whether people understand you are not local or not. You’re welcome.

How to be a tourist in Norway

Inspired by this post.

How to be a tourist in Norway

Arrive on a cruise ship whenever possible.
If the above is not possible and you are arriving on a bus; be very Asian.
Have no regard for private property – Norway is your oyster!
Complain about how expensive it is to any customer service worker you are dealing with. I’m sure it’s the ticket officer herself who set the prices here.
Be mesmerised by the majestic nature, but ask us where the fjord is anyway. You may have missed it.
Don’t believe us when we say that all the country’s beauty is natural. Ask us when we turn off the waterfalls and if we drain the fjords in the Winter. Hint: We do not.
Insist on driving through our hairpin turns, in spite of locals advising you to take the outer route. Those roads aren’t meant for the untrained eye.
Carry one of these.
Don’t bother with research, knowing why the fjords are so popular and what they are isn’t necessary.
If English is your first language: act incredibly surprised when every single Norwegian person you meet speak it fluently.
If English isn’t your first language: ask us if we speak Spanish.

Now you should be all set to come and visit my beautiful country. Welcome!

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  • haha! We live (as expats, but I’ve had a home here since I was 13, so it feels like forever) in a tourist destination, too. Sometimes tourists are just plain embarrassing. With my pale skin I can be mistaken for a tourist by locals but that problem is easily solved when I break into Mandarin or Bahasa…

    • Haha, that sounds like a sure way to prove to people you are indeed not a tourist, Rachel! 🙂

  • Hahahah Hilarious!! please walk in high heels when hiking the mountains! 🙂

    • Hahaha, that’s another great one, Pauline! 🙂

  • Karin Rambo

    So awesome! I cringe just thinking about these things haha!

    • Haha, me too, Karin! 🙂

  • LOL – i love it. Be very asian 😉 This post is classic. I do have some friends that do live in Norway, now I’ll know how to act. I’ve always wanted to see a fjord…………

    • Thank you, Chiara! You’ll act like a proper Norwegian when you come visit them! And you’ll love the fjords 🙂

  • Haha! I would love to visit but hopefully not act too much like this 😉

    • Please do come visit, and please don’t act like this, haha 🙂 I have a feeling you’d be fine, Becky!

  • I’m so desperately wanting to visit Norway. It looks so beautiful. Hopefully not as you describe 😉

    Katie // Words By Katie

    • It truly is beautiful, but unfortunately many tourists act exactly as I’ve described 😛

      🙂

  • Arzo Travels

    Haha. Love this post. Really, really want to visit and I will do all the things mentioned above 🙂

    • I’m glad! Haha, if you do; PLEASE film reactions on SnapChat! You should have seen mine the other day when I was standing on the docks and someone asked me where the fjords was… 🙂